An Easier Way to Shift Beliefs

Beliefs shape our reality. This is one of the fundamental truths of our existence. Today there are many techniques available to change beliefs. Most of the people that come to me for coaching have already worked on their beliefs using a variety of mental techniques. They are frustrated that they have done belief work, but haven’t seen and felt a shift – internally and externally.

A lot of clients come to me feeling stuck in old belief systems, and disappointed that their belief processing exercise is falling short. I have observed a vicious cycle that many people find themselves trapped in, which actually works to more deeply embed the unwanted belief. It goes something like this:

I need to heal this negative belief –> uses belief processing exercise –> does not feel the new reality viscerally –> does not experience change in their outer reality –> feels disappointment –> becomes more focused on the problem of the belief –> draws more inward and negatively focused on the belief

Belief processing exercises can be wonderful for milder beliefs. But what about those that arise from trauma, or core beliefs, that shape our identity?

For deeply embedded negative beliefs, I highly recommend creating rather than problem solving. Get out of the loop of problem solving all together. This is the most grounded way to transform negative beliefs. And I believe it’s the best way to dissolve core negative patterns.

I know someone who I will call Emily. Emily is gifted, wise, and extremely sensitive. She came to me because she could not shift her negative self-image. She struggled with self-love and feeling the higher emotions such as joy, and love.

When we first met she gave me a long list of the spiritual courses, books and seminars she had gone through. I learned about all of the belief processing exercises she knew. I noticed right away that she was very analytical, and focused on problem-solving. Her Guidance was pointing her in the right direction, but she was not engaging her body awareness and intuition to create the life she wanted.

During our first conversation, I asked Emily what she did for fun. She didn’t know. “What lights you up?” I pressed. “Well, I like spirituality and reading, but lately I’ve been so disappointed in my lack of growth that even that is no longer fun for me,” she replied. Her self-care routine included meditation and belief processing exercises.

I suggested that Emily take the focus off shifting her negative beliefs about herself, and start creating a life that reflected LOVE. Every day, she wrote a list of things she liked about herself. She promised to do three things that made her feel loved everyday. These were simple things, like setting aside time to take a bath while listening to her favorite music, walking in her favorite park, and buying herself fresh flowers.

I encouraged her to explore her depths, and try activities that made her feel joy in her body. Emily had a few stumbles, because she had never been encouraged to express herself. But over time she found that she loved to write and also loved ballroom dancing. When she danced she felt the sense of oneness and self-love that she had been searching for. She became better at feeling her way to where she wanted to go, instead of trying to figure it out.

I love working with people to help them create the reality they prefer. A big part of this is shifting beliefs, and learning to feel the desired state in the body. This is the best way to transform intellectual knowing into an embodied state.